Dear Free Range Parents,
I get it. I do. You want your kids independent and you value their choices as future adults. You want to give them the "opportunity to learn to calm themselves, assess their situation, and try to problem solve their own way out of it. to learn that to learn that falling is possible but worth the risk, and that they can, in fact, get up again". I am calling out this blog in particular:
http://patch.com/california/alameda/bp--please-dont-help-my-kids
Because I have to push back. I am getting so tired of all these blogs circulating via facebook with parents calling out other parents for helping their kids. Because
you want to know what? I am an attentive parent and I am not going to apologize for it anymore.
On one part I like it. I want all those things for my kid too. But I also want my kids to live a long and healthy life. I have the internet so I read all the time about stupid accidents that happen to kids and I would never forgive myself if I was not there. So I try to find a balance. I do not want to be a "HELICOPTER" But honestly if I have to choose. I would pick that over letting my kids run amok. It would be SO MUCH EASIER, if I just sat on the play ground and used my phone or read a book. But I do not. Because while you are giving your child the "opportunity to learn to calm themselves, assess their situation, and try to problem solve their own way out of it. to learn that to learn that falling is possible but worth the risk, and that they can, in fact, get up again". I am in fact making sure your child does not die. I am making sure that your kids does not throw rocks at my kid. I am making sure that your kid does not push my baby off the slide. I am parenting. We are not raising free range chickens here folks, they are kids and they need us to protect them, guide them, teach them right and wrong. And when my kid falls I want them to learn that I will be there to pick them up and that they are loved. And, because they are so loved I will help them face their fear and try it again.
And for those rare times I am not right there being the strong Mama Bear I claim to be and I see you help my kid down the slide or off the rock climbing wall-I want to say instead: THANK YOU. Thank you for helping my baby safely down and making sure my thrill seeking toddler can slide down the slide clearly labeled for 9 + (including a huge danger sign for parents that just don't get it). Because I would be there, but I can't right now. I am chasing my other toddler around with my heart in my mouth panicking because I can't be in two (or three) places at the same time.
I think if I wanted to adhere to a cliche parenting type. I would like to define myself as a "drone" parent. I am always there, hovering watching and ready to swoop in. I give my kids space but not too much because deep down -- they know -- I am somewhere close and watching. I am taking pictures of them. I am smiling and beaming at how amazing they are. And I will be there in a jiffy to help.
THANKS & YOU ARE WELCOME:
HELICOPTER MOM IN THE PLAYGROUND.
I get it. I do. You want your kids independent and you value their choices as future adults. You want to give them the "opportunity to learn to calm themselves, assess their situation, and try to problem solve their own way out of it. to learn that to learn that falling is possible but worth the risk, and that they can, in fact, get up again". I am calling out this blog in particular:
http://patch.com/california/alameda/bp--please-dont-help-my-kids
Because I have to push back. I am getting so tired of all these blogs circulating via facebook with parents calling out other parents for helping their kids. Because
you want to know what? I am an attentive parent and I am not going to apologize for it anymore.
On one part I like it. I want all those things for my kid too. But I also want my kids to live a long and healthy life. I have the internet so I read all the time about stupid accidents that happen to kids and I would never forgive myself if I was not there. So I try to find a balance. I do not want to be a "HELICOPTER" But honestly if I have to choose. I would pick that over letting my kids run amok. It would be SO MUCH EASIER, if I just sat on the play ground and used my phone or read a book. But I do not. Because while you are giving your child the "opportunity to learn to calm themselves, assess their situation, and try to problem solve their own way out of it. to learn that to learn that falling is possible but worth the risk, and that they can, in fact, get up again". I am in fact making sure your child does not die. I am making sure that your kids does not throw rocks at my kid. I am making sure that your kid does not push my baby off the slide. I am parenting. We are not raising free range chickens here folks, they are kids and they need us to protect them, guide them, teach them right and wrong. And when my kid falls I want them to learn that I will be there to pick them up and that they are loved. And, because they are so loved I will help them face their fear and try it again.
And for those rare times I am not right there being the strong Mama Bear I claim to be and I see you help my kid down the slide or off the rock climbing wall-I want to say instead: THANK YOU. Thank you for helping my baby safely down and making sure my thrill seeking toddler can slide down the slide clearly labeled for 9 + (including a huge danger sign for parents that just don't get it). Because I would be there, but I can't right now. I am chasing my other toddler around with my heart in my mouth panicking because I can't be in two (or three) places at the same time.
I think if I wanted to adhere to a cliche parenting type. I would like to define myself as a "drone" parent. I am always there, hovering watching and ready to swoop in. I give my kids space but not too much because deep down -- they know -- I am somewhere close and watching. I am taking pictures of them. I am smiling and beaming at how amazing they are. And I will be there in a jiffy to help.
And Yes, I will help your kid down the slide too. Because your kid is begging for help while you ignore him/her and my kid is next in line and wants a turn too.
I know, I am so un-cool.
I am making sure your kid stops doing whatever he or she is doing to my kid because you are practicing a hip laid back parenting style and sitting on the bench using your smart phone. You drink wine at BBQs and I chase kids. I hover and protect and watch my kids like a hawk and I am also watching over your kids too. Your welcome. All this just makes it really stressful for me and honestly I have enough stress right now. I don't need more. But I love kids and I want them all happy and safe--especially mine.
I know, I am so un-cool.
I am making sure your kid stops doing whatever he or she is doing to my kid because you are practicing a hip laid back parenting style and sitting on the bench using your smart phone. You drink wine at BBQs and I chase kids. I hover and protect and watch my kids like a hawk and I am also watching over your kids too. Your welcome. All this just makes it really stressful for me and honestly I have enough stress right now. I don't need more. But I love kids and I want them all happy and safe--especially mine.
THANKS & YOU ARE WELCOME:
HELICOPTER MOM IN THE PLAYGROUND.
No comments:
Post a Comment